Chapter 8.

Read chapter 7 here with Cupcakemummy.


The Duck and the Cat

Quacks and Meows

Stupid cat and stupid duck

Crappy children’s book

Chinese food

Feathers and Fur

Yeah ok, the last one we can work with. Personally I thought “Book 1” had a certain rustic charm about it. But what do I know. I only sold half a million copies of my first novel titled “Tits in the rain”.

(It was an acronym okay) Then again maybe I sold half a million because it had the word “tits” in the title. Actually I have often wondered how many horny guys bought the book thinking it was pages and pages of wonderfully perky wet boobs. I wish my boobs were perkier.

I need to mail back that illustrator. I hadn’t really thought about a contract but to be honest, I don’t really care either. Colour Media pays. Jobs hers. I think I have a standard agreement somewhere. Her sketches are good though. Like really good. But I’m not gonna tell her just yet. Why does everyone have to better at everything than me. I am such a fucking failure.

Email: To: Winter

             From: Iris

             Attached: Illustration Agreement Colour Media House

             Subject: Feathers and Fur


  Hi Winter,

            Attached is the standard agreement for Colour Media. I hope you find it in order. Please give  them a shout if you want to know or change something. Thank you for the base sketches. They are adequate. We can work on it if you wish to continue this project. The duck is too…happy. They are lonely, sad creatures. I feel this needs to be highlighted more.

Maybe she won’t notice how insecure I am about my work. Obituaries are better written than my latest stuff.

            We can discuss this further once I have written an alternate.

My first novel was famous for having two endings. Giving the reader the choice to end it off in the way they see fit. Why shouldn’t my children’s book have one? The kid can decide how he wants it to end. Preparing for the real world. Where all you do as an adult is make choices every day. Korn Flakes or Rice Crispies, Hair loose or hair up, tea or coffee, left or right, A or B. Might as well write it, like life.

          Would I be able to give you a call to discuss the some design ideas I had in mind?                                 What do you think of the book done completely in black and white?

She will probably flip her lid for that comment. Her base sketches were pretty colourful.

         Let me know.



RING RING RING – I see Eliots name pop up on the screen. I slide my finger across the screen to avoid the call. I haven’t been to therapy in 3 weeks now. Screw Therapy.



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